I'm going to be honest. I haven't felt like myself these last few days. I'm not sure if its the pregnancy or what exactly. I have lots of reasons to be happy, so why am I so irritable?
I have ups and downs all day. Everything is great, then there is bickering. Oh the bickering. And let's not forget repeating myself 16.724 times. Then my very involved 4 year olds want to help me do everything in the kitchen. This would be so wonderful if there wasn't the bickering, and the arguing over who gets to do what and when. And what really sends me over the edge is how one daughter in particular likes to move me out of the way-while I'm mixing or cooking something- because she can't see.
What is wrong with me? I normally find joy in them 97.8% of the time. It's not that I haven't the last few days, it just feels that my irritation has taken over. Sometimes I just want to sit down, alone. You know without having two kids crawl and argue over who gets to sit on which side of my pregnant self.
I know it must sound like all they do is bicker, and I'm sure that my emotional self is blowing it out of proportion. I know its my mood and attitude that's the problem, not them. They're children afterall.
I'm thankful for the Lord's mercy and grace, without it, I'd for sure feel like a failure all the time.
My poor kids. They always get the raw end of the deal. They're good kids, they really are. Like I said before, I know its just me, because they haven't been the only ones that have sent me deep breathing!
Someone please tell me I'm not alone. I've got to get out of this funk. I don't like it one bit. I feel horrible! I don't remember feeling this way when pregnant with the girls...but I also didn't have any other children..
Please forgive me for my complaining ramble. If you have any encouragement, could you please leave it in the comments? If nothing else, could you just say a prayer for me? This has had me so emotional.
awww, I cant say i know how you feel, because I am just now pregnant with my first. But actually, these last couple of weeks I have finally felt a little more normal and happy. Before I was feeling the "what is worng with me" mood too.
ReplyDeleteI was all depressed and felt anxious about basically nothing at all, and i felt it all the time. To me I feel its Im having my first at an older age and so used to it being my husband and me. And the thought of adjusting to being responsible for another life 24/7 scares me to death.
Im finally starting to get excited and happy. Even tho I have my moments. Im an over thinker and worry wart.
Im sure you are overwhelmed of the thought of caring for a newborn and your girls making you crazy, trying to steel your attention away. And feeling you just need a break before more responsibilty comes your way. Dont feel bad or quilty,Im sure it will pass. At some points I was ready to go to the Dr and tell her I needed counseling or something, I was so desperate to feel better and myself again. But I just kept praying about it. And keeping busy, finding projects to do for the new baby. You are a terrific mom and person. I wish we were closer friends before friending on fb. You seem like someone I would love to be around. Maybe take a day for yourself. Get out of the house and do something you have been meaning to do for a long time. You deserve it. I hope I helped and didnt blab too much about myself. Pregnancy is an emotional overload, it will pass and soon enough she will be here and you wont be able to stop smiling ... Keeping you in my prayers.
Thank you so much Michelle for your kind words! You didn't blab too much about yourself! After I read this last night, I got in bed and started praying and then crying. I'm doing so much better today! I'm available any time you need to talk! I'm sure we could help each other along. ;)
Delete