Let's Stop Being Judgmental

The other day I read a status on Facebook. One of the commenters replied that if someone complains about their kids, she doesn't even want to be their friend. Really?! I haven't been able to get it out of my mind.

I really couldn't believe that someone is actually that judgmental.

We are mothers. We aren't perfect in any way shape or form. We ALL have bad days. I'm sure we all have had days where we go to bed thinking we are the worst mother in the world or where we want to cry right along with our child. I have. It's called life.

We are all growing and learning, trying to figure out which direction it is that the Lord is wanting us to go. Are we not allowed to talk about it, or vent about our trials that we are experiencing at the moment? If we do will it end up in a case of someone not wanting to be our friend?

What we should do is reach out to that person. We should try to encourage them. Build them up, because I can almost guarantee that they have already knocked themselves down so far that they don't need your judgement. They need to know that they're not alone in this thing called parenting. They need a friend.

It's hard being a mom. I would much rather have someone to talk to that is real and honest, than one who acts like they have everything put together. No one has parenting perfected. Why do you think there are so many parenting books on the market? Those parents have struggled too, and they want to share what they feel "worked" for them. They aren't ashamed or embarrassed to talk about their struggles. Why should we be? They wrote the books to try to help others through.


I do not have anything figured out. I get up everyday not knowing what may happen. I pray for a good day, patience, kindness, and most of all to love and enjoy my children. They are a blessing, even at the moments that I don't feel so blessed.

If God can give us mercy and grace, don't you think we should be able to bestow that upon others? Let's stop being so judgmental to other mothers. Let's reach out and be a support for them. Be that sounding block, that shoulder for them to lean on, and most importantly that friend that we all need.

Needing Some Fellow Mama Encouragement

I'm going to be honest. I haven't felt like myself these last few days. I'm not sure if its the pregnancy or what exactly. I have lots of reasons to be happy, so why am I so irritable?

I have ups and downs all day. Everything is great, then there is bickering. Oh the bickering. And let's not forget repeating myself 16.724 times. Then my very involved 4 year olds want to help me do everything in the kitchen. This would be so wonderful if there wasn't the bickering, and the arguing over who gets to do what and when. And what really sends me over the edge is how one daughter in particular likes to move me out of the way-while I'm mixing or cooking something- because she can't see.

What is wrong with me? I normally find joy in them 97.8% of the time. It's not that I haven't the last few days, it just feels that my irritation has taken over. Sometimes I just want to sit down, alone. You know without having two kids crawl and argue over who gets to sit on which side of my pregnant self.

I know it must sound like all they do is bicker, and I'm sure that my emotional self is blowing it out of proportion. I know its my mood and attitude that's the problem, not them. They're children afterall.

I'm thankful for the Lord's mercy and grace, without it, I'd for sure feel like a failure all the time.

My poor kids. They always get the raw end of the deal. They're good kids, they really are. Like I said before, I know its just me, because they haven't been the only ones that have sent me deep breathing!

Someone please tell me I'm not alone. I've got to get out of this funk. I don't like it one bit. I feel horrible! I don't remember feeling this way when pregnant with the girls...but I also didn't have any other children..

Please forgive me for my complaining ramble. If you have any encouragement, could you please leave it in the comments? If nothing else, could you just say a prayer for me? This has had me so emotional.

Why we have chosen to homeschool

I always get asked, "are your girls in preschool yet?" I reply, "well..not exactly yet. We are going to homeschool." The response I always get is, "oh. I couldn't do that."

I never thought I would do such a thing either, but when the girls were about two months old, the Lord told me that's what I would be doing, and it's still the plan 4 years later.

Why, you ask?

The following is just me sharing my feelings. It is in no way to be judgemental, or to make anyone feel like the choices they have made are wrong. These are just simply our choices and I have chosen to share them with with you.

After the girls were born, my husband and I had a some personal marriage issues. The Lord really pressed it upon my heart that the direction he wanted us to go was to homeschool the girls. I have to admit, the thought is a bit terrifying, but I know that if this is what the Lord wants me to do, He will see me through.

Once I felt the Lord tell me this, I started reading more in my Bible. Yes, yes this is truly what He wants for my children!

Deuteronomy 6

⁴ Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one.^[a] 5 Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. ⁶ These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts. ⁷ Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. ⁸ Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. ⁹ Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.



Deuteronomy 7
^6 
4 for they will turn your children away from following me to serve other gods, and the Lord’s anger will burn against you and will quickly destroy you.

Proverbs 22

Train^[a] a child in the way he should go,
    and when he is old he will not turn from it.

These are just a few scriptures that speak to me. How can I follow these instructions if I'm sending my children away from me? They would be spending more time with a perfect stranger, and very influential children, than they would with me. I just wasn't happy with this thought. 

These are my perfectly innocent children. I cannot send them to a place where I have no control over what they are taught, what they are exposed to, what other children are teaching them. They are very impressionable, and it's my job to make sure they are learning what God wants them to learn. 

Today in schools, God is not allowed. Sex is talked about on the playground in the first grade. What? Sex? First grade? Yes people, it is! I didn't even know what sex was at that age. Some of you may be thinking, "you can't keep your children in a bubble, or away from the 'real world'."  You are correct, and I can't do that, but what I can do, is do my best to protect them from what I'm able to. I want to preserve their innocence for as long as possible.

I want my children to learn about their Creator, their Savior. I want to train them in the way they should go. I want to make sure I impress upon them the morals and values that God wants them to have. Not ones that they learn from other children, or their teachers. Deuteronomy 7 ⁴ for they will turn your children away from following me to serve other gods, and the Lord’s anger will burn against you and will quickly destroy you. This could not be more true. 

These children are a gift to my husband and I. My husband is more than supportive of our plans to homeschool. I'm sure many people don't agree with our plans, and that's ok. We don't have to agree. I'm not here to judge anyone on their choices, and I hope no one judges us on ours. This is what we feel we are called to do. 

These are a few comments from a blog I like to read, about why these parents have chosen to homeschool, I couldn't have said it much better myself: 

“To protect their minds from wrong teaching until they are strong enough in their faith to counter it!”

“I could probably write a book with all my reasons! But the biggest is for my kids’ protection (spiritual, emotional and physical). Kids these days are exposed to things children are not prepared to handle, and forced to make choices children should never have to make. Innocence is so no longer valued in our society, so in order to preserve it as parents, the best thing we can do is to shelter and nurture them until they are prepared to handle the “real world.”

“#1 reason so that my son has a place that has no restrictions on being taught about Jesus and to protect his mind spiritually, emotionally. To embrace every single moment of his journey. Having no restrictions on anything he wants to study. Most of all-embracing the lessons that the Lord is using my child to teach me ♥”

I do not have the patience of Job. I certainly am not the prime candidate to homeschool, I am not a teacher, but you know what? I'm certainly up for the challenge, because I have come to realize that it's not about me, it's about my children. They are the most important thing, and I want to do everything  I can to give them the best life possible.

Has the Lord led any of you to homeschool? Please share your thoughts with me! 



For further reading:

Public School is Not a Child’s Ministry
Reasons Why We Homeschool

24 hours of alone time...coming up!

Last Friday I called my mother in law asking if she could keep the girls on Thursday and for the majority of the day Friday. She said absolutely. I told her I wanted a full 24 hours alone.

Can I just say, I'm SO excited!!

I have a bunch of stuff I'd like to do, and absolutely none of it involves cleaning, laundry, picking up after children, preparing a meal at a certain time...you know the everyday life of a stay at home mom.

Nope, it will look more like this...sewing project, or at least attempt! Possibly make candles, watch a movie, scrapbook, read a book, crochet....whatever my heart desires!

I think I'll bake myself a yummy snack ahead of time, maybe put some food in the crockpot for dinner. 
I absolutely love and adore my children and husband. They are the reason I do everything I do....but I am so thrilled for this time alone. I will be with me, myself, and I. How great is that?

I'm sure I will miss them all. I always do. But some 'me' time is always appreciated. It gives me a chance to regroup, and they love the time spent with their grandparents, all of them.

Do any of you have any fun suggestions for me to do at home? I don't have intentions of leaving the house until its time to pick up my munchkins! I wish Starbucks delivered. I may just have to learn how to make my own yummy drinks. My husband is VERY thankful there isn't a Starbucks in our town. Yikes!

Lay your ideas on me friends! What fun things do you do?

Here are a few fun pics from the last week...

A Parenting Lesson Learned

Today, the moment when I am most repelled by a child’s behavior, that is my sign to draw the very closest to that child.

It's so funny how the Lord gives us just what we need, when we need it. I read this yesterday while I was waiting for my mom to bring the girls home from staying the night at her house. They're always so tired when they stay with someone else.

They started playing as soon as they got home. After about 20 minutes or so Mackenzie began to get very angry and upset with Taylor. She didn't like how she was playing, or whatever she was doing. Mackenzie wanted to be in control.

I gave her a few warnings. I told her she wasn't using a kind voice, and that she was being mean. She needed to play nice.

Next thing I knew she was grabbing her sister in her arms through clenched teeth, being very mean. I snatched her up and we headed for her room for a little time out, so she could cool off.

She was screaming, kicking her legs, yelling I don't want to sit on my bed, all with her arms wrapped around my neck.

Usually this kind of behavior would get her a spanking, but this wasn't normal behavior for her.

This kept popping into my mind: Today, the moment when I am most repelled by a child’s behavior, that is my sign to draw the very closest to that child.

I cradled her like I always do when she's hurt or upset. She was crying. She was clearly distressed, and tired.

We sat there while I held her and we talked. She finally calmed down. We laid on her bed and we talked some more. We talked about her behavior, and then we just talked about nothing. I held her in my arms, just letting her know that I loved her.

Her sister came back with a book of stickers all ready to play and share. Mackenzie got up, happy as can be. She was perfectly fine the rest of the day. Not one more episode.

I was so thankful I didn't lose my patience with her. I kept my temper under control, which isn't exactly easy to do with a screaming and kicking child.

I was so thankful that the Lord led me to that sentence. Today, the moment when I am most repelled by a child’s behavior, that is my sign to draw the very closest to that child.

I'm not embarrassed or ashamed to say that I really have no idea what I'm doing. I'm just a mom of two 4 year olds who is trying to instill good behavior in her kids, who does get angry more often that I'd like. I'm not perfect. I just want to raise my children to love the Lord, and be kind to others.

After the situation with Mackenzie I was very grateful to the Lord for the parenting lesson. Afterall, children learn by example. What example do I want to leave them with? It's ok to have an emotional breakdown, and children do have them as well. A little attention and love can fix almost anything.

A moment of thankfulness

The girls and I woke up yesterday not feeling too hot. Sneezing and snotty noses have been our high points.

Today, although I didn't feel well at all, I had to do something with the 40lbs of apples that have been sitting on my kitchen floor. I had asked my mother in law if she could come help me make them into applesauce. Bless her heart she obliged.

After the applesauce was finished, I decided to lay down and rest. I was so wiped out. She kept the girls occupied for awhile which was heavenly.

As I was resting, I spent some time praying. I had been thinking I have been feeling this little baby move, but I'm just 100% sure. It's been so long since I've been pregnant, and I knew when the girls were moving right away (benefit of two at once I guess), but this has been a different feeling. It's so intense. I had prayed that when this little baby moved, the Lord would make it completely obvious to me.

With having lost Trenton at 17 weeks, I have tried to stay so positive about this pregnancy, but I think we as women always worry, until we see that precious face.

I was laying in bed tonight talking with my husband. He had asked if it was just allergies bothering me, or a cold. I have just recently gotten over a cold. I was telling him how I felt, and I was fighting back tears at the same time. I just don't feel at all like my "normal" self.

Almost instantly, after we grew silent, the Lord answered my prayer. I felt this little baby kick for the first time. It was so amazing. It was the lightest kick. If I wouldn't have been paying attention I wouldn't have felt it.

I shed some tears and thanked the Lord for giving me that blessing. He always gives us just what we need. Sometimes we forget though.

Lately I haven't been spending a whole lot of time with Him, but yet He answered my prayer, because He loves me.

I'm so thankful for his mercy and grace. Without it I would surely feel like a failure, more than I already do.

Thank you Jesus for this beautiful blessing.