Hey Beautiful,

This morning my trainer tagged me in a picture that was everything that I needed to hear today. Funny how that works out. 

Before my workout this morning I took some new measurements so I could see how much progress I've made, according to the tape measure. In a little over a month it's been 2 inches. I told myself, "Two inches is still wonderful. It's better than gaining two inches. Be proud of that." 

I got done with my workout this morning and read these words: 

Can I get an Amen? Perfection! I have a love/hate relationship with social media. Because of it I have gained some pretty great people in my life, my trainer one of them, but it's also the perfect place to find discontentment about yourself. We see so many rockin bodies and we get envious. We see sayings like, "don't settle for mediocre," and so we start doubting ourselves. We wonder if we are settling because we aren't trying to kill ourselves to get to the next level. 

Just because we are in the process of getting that rockin body, or whatever it is you're chasing after, doesn't mean we're settling for mediocre. This is what I've been telling myself. We all have different goals in mind. I have just really had to back off and tell myself, you are enough! I may not be where I want to be with every aspect of my life, but I'm so far from where I once was. 

Maybe this is as good as my body will ever look. Will that be enough for me? It should be. I will keep working hard to stay healthy, and if it changes then that is incredible, but if it doesn't, then that should be incredible too. It has birthed 4 children, it has nursed 3 babies, it has withstood a lot of pain, and it's still going.  I have battle wounds to reflect just how much it's been through, and it's far from perfect. 

There is still body fat on it, there are freckles that are all over it. There are these little lines that are starting to show around my eyes, but I'm not going to dislike myself any longer. I'm proud of myself and I'm loving the changes that are happening. 

I want to show my daughters that if you don't like something about yourself, you have the power to change that. I want to give them self confidence to know that doesn't mean undergoing any kind of plastic surgery. They don't have to be "perfect," I don't have to "perfect," you don't have to be "perfect" to be beautiful. We are all beautiful, we just have to believe that about ourselves.  

I am beautiful, just the way I am. Beauty isn't reflected on what size my waist is, what the number on the scale is, or even how perfect my skin is. It's reflected on the way I live. The way I love. The way I treat people. 

One thing I've learned for sure is how you can start with one goal, and it escalates from there. I've reached a place where I have realized just how important it is to love myself through all stages of my journey. Not just when I feel I've "arrived" at where I want to be. 

Do I still beat myself up sometimes and think I'm not doing good enough because I haven't made as much progress as so and so on the flipping Internet? Yes! I'm ridiculous like that sometimes. I'm real. I'm not going to lie about it. I doubt myself, and where does it get me? Nowhere! Absolutely nowhere. We're all different. Our journeys are different. Our bodies are different.

I'm sure we can all agree on one thing though, we all want to be happy and healthy. So let's do that. Leave some encouragement for someone today. You know how much you need it. They're no different. 

Until NextTime, 

Erica 

Give Yourself A Little Grace

Grace. I'm soaking in the sweetness of these 5 letters lately....

I had a blog post typed up for you, and then life happened and the post changed direction. We are in the last five weeks of homeschool and can I just say how READY I AM for summer?!!! R.E.A.D.Y. 

Sometimes life can just make you feel a little stretched and frazzled. Anybody else feel a little stretched thin sometimes? I spent my weekend filling up my tank, because it's been low. Way low. I'm refreshed and rejuvenated since I took some time to really invest in me and fill my soul. 

The words Grace have meant so much to me lately that I decided to hang the letters on my wall where I can see it from every angle in my living room/kitchen area. They are a sweet reminder that on the hard days, the days where I may feel like my bad moments make a bad mama, I have this sweetness of Grace covering me. 

I don't have to be perfect all the time and have everything together. I'm being humbled and learning that sometimes it's really okay to hit that roadblock and not know which direction I'm supposed to turn. I'm learning to be still and listen. 

I just want to encourage you today that bad moments don't make bad mamas/wives/girlfriends/friends, etc. We all need to allow ourselves Grace, and the opportunity to grow. I don't know about you, but I haven't done much growing when I think I already know everything. I like to know that I'm not alone in the beautiful chaos of this life. That things don't have to be "perfect" all the time and we can still be happy! 

I know some of you may not have children, but I'm sure you've still got a plate full with this crazy thing we call LIFE! When we reach that place where we say, "Whoa...what's happening here?"  It's okay to step back and give yourself Grace and Be Still.  

Have a wonderful week, friends. We have so much to be thankful for. Let us strive for less perfection and a lot more love and kindness. Give yourself the Grace you deserve and not feel guilty for not being "perfect", whatever that is.  

Until Next time, 

Erica  

Sometimes Mama Needs Forgiveness

I just needed to take a minute to remind myself why I have decided to travel down this road of homeschooling. It's not because I need my kids with me at every moment to feel like I'm a good mother. It actually has nothing to do with me and everything to do with them. 

There are several reasons that I have written about before, and probably will again in the future. But today, oh today, I was given a reminder just why I chose the hard stuff. 

There she sat doing her math. Taylor had already breezed right through hers, and Mackenzie was just not wanting to do hers. "I need help! Nobody will help me!" I told her she knew what she needed to do, and she just needed to do it. I'm not going to sit and give her the answers, plus she knows the stuff she was doing. She just didn't want to do it. 

Seems like everyday someone "just can't do it". That's ok, I'm getting this figured out now, we'll sort-of, ok not really, but I'll try to pretend. Ha! 

She was really angry. I just didn't understand why. She bit the eraser off her pencil, and was just being nasty. I asked her what was wrong and it went from "you won't help me...nobody likes me, you said I'm the messiest child, and you don't love me..." 

She lost it. She was just crying and crying. I picked her up and told her "you are the most perfect little girl. You are fearfully and wonderfully made, and whether you're a little messy sometimes does not determine your worth and will never make me stop loving you!" 

Our conversation went on for a little while with me reminding her of her strengths, and just how much I love her. I didn't realize how much my comment to her Grandma about her being messy really bothered her. It wasn't even something that happened recently, but she had obviously bottled those feelings up inside and they came out today. This gave me an opportunity to ask her for forgiveness, and reassure her of how much I love her. 

Had she of not been with me, and at public school, this probably would have played out differently. It would have come across as her being disobedient and she would have gotten in trouble. 

I was reminded today that in every moment I'm teaching and training my children. We all mess up, and we all make mistakes, even Mamas. My words have the ability to build up or break down. Even something as little as saying she was messy, broke her down, and maybe you're thinking she's just sensitive or played me for a fool, but that's not how it really is. Even if she's just overly sensitive, that is just the way she is, and I have to accept that. I don't want to change the way God made her. I want her to know that her feelings matter and we need to release them in a healthy way. 

We finished up our hugs and kisses and she finished up her math lesson in about 10 minutes, with much confidence. 

This homeschool thing isn't about me at all. I sacrifice daily to give them the best that I possibly can. It's tough. They drive me up the wall somedays, but every bit of it is worth it. Even the messy house and sometimes sticky floor (thanks to the jar of pickles somebody dropped today). 

I wouldn't trade it for anything. Before I know it this will all just be a distant memory and my house will be so clean and there will be no noise. #thisisnow 

Until Next Time....

Erica 

Living With Intention

A couple weeks ago I felt God give me a little nudge and a thought for a potential name change for my social media identity. I guess what I have now is too boring? ;) 

I feel there have been so many changes that I've made in my personal growth in these last few months, that maybe it is time for a name change. 

6 1/2 years ago I became a mother and thought I would be able to remember all of the memories we created. Fast forward to now and I can't even remember last week. I remember the big things, but not the little things that make up our days. Those little things is what makes up my life. 

The new words that the twins have learned how to read. How M got over her fear of riding her bike, how C is saying a new word everyday. How T taught herself how to shoot hoops. I want to remember them. This is now. 

Staying home and raising 3 kids all while homeschooling is no easy feat. God doesn't give twins to be parented by the fainthearted, much less homeschool them--together. While I'm not a single parent, I'm still the one doing 80% of the parenting around here, since I'm the one with them 24/7. It just comes with the territory. I'm totally okay with that, because this is what I've been led to do...but somedays we are in the trenches. Deep. I'm not going to hide it. What's the point? Why would I want to give the perception life is peachy keen and my house is always perfect? Uh. Not hardly. 

We still have days where I count it a success that all three kids are still alive when I shut their door at night. Can I get an Amen? 

There is more to this everyday life than just making it through the day-and sometimes trenches. There is purpose. There is purpose in the good, bad, and the ugly. There is purpose in the trenches. There is a bigger picture. There is growth to be had. 

I want to live my days with intention. I want to go to bed at night and know that even in the midst of the good, and the bad days, I did my best. I have been called to do extraordinary things. I want to be intentional with what God has given me, and I want to remember the moments. All of them. 

I want to spend my days more focused on my daughters' hearts than whether or not the dishes are put away. I want to feed their interests, and their self esteem. I want to grow with them. Everyday we have the opportunity to grow and change. I don't want to stay the same. I want to be an intentional mother. Focus on the now, today. This is it. 

This is a process. I can't just make it happen overnight. I wish I could, but that's not the way life works. I know we're still going to have good and bad days because that's life, and it's a beautiful messy life that I wouldn't trade for anything in the world.

I decided that I needed to document my days so I can reflect back upon them later. 

I ordered this cute little Mom's One Line A Day memory book from amazon. I can jot down a quick line before bed about the most memorable and most important moment of the day. I really like that it doesn't need to be much. Short and sweet, just how I like it. 

The next two things are a planner and a journal. My intentions for the planner is to write down the scripture I read that day that spoke to me the most. It's already dated, so I will be more eager to pick it up and write a quick note. The journal is just for anything else I need to write about. I'm TERRIBLE at journaling, but I have hopes that these two tools will help me to stay on course. 

Back to the name change idea....

I've been a little skeptical of the name that was put in my head. I wasn't sure it made a lot of sense. I've thought a lot about it these last couple weeks, and the more I think about it, the more I think it seems fitting at this point in my life. 

          Intentional Erica 

Give me some feedback....what do you think? 

I would also really love to know if you journal and what you use. Anything specific to make it more fun? 

Until next time..XO 

Erica 

A New Leaf

I'm so sorry I've been absent from the blog. I just felt like maybe the blog world wasn't for me anymore. I have plenty to say, but that doesn't mean others will want to read what my thoughts are. There is a reason my blog is called Ramblings of a Redheaded Mama...you never know what I'm going to talk about!

I've had several people encourage me to get back into it. I do my best blogging when I just start typing when the thoughts are flowing. That tends to happen at the most inopportune times...like mid workout! Not the most ideal time to start blogging. Ha! 

Since I have deleted my Facebook, I wasn't sure how my posts would reach any readers. I didn't want to invest time and energy into blogging...just for cyberspace. I also don't blog about one topic in particular. I have a variety of interests, so I don't want to pick just one and only talk about that. 

I had previously thought about deleting all my old posts, because they are just that-old; but then I thought maybe I needed to leave them. They are a part of me, and my growth as a woman, wife and mother, and it may be good for me to reflect upon that later on. 

So I'm asking you a favor. :) If you read something you like, hit that share button at the bottom of the page, and drop me a line. I love to hear from my readers! 

I have a few fun things up my sleeve. A couple DIY tutorials, and a few other topics that are already on my mind. 

You can also read my posts on nobellagrace.blogspot.com, as I'm a guest blogger for her there. Fun things lie ahead and I'm wanting share the fun with y'all! 

Until next time...XO 

Erica 

Putting On Your Oxygen Mask

I want to let you in on a little secret that has revolutionized my life....

You know when you're on an airplane and the attendant tells you that in case of an emergency to "put on your oxygen mask first, before assisting others?"  Let me tell you how this applies to your everyday life! 

While this post isn't about me, it's about YOU, I feel the best way for me to paint you a visual is by telling you my story. 

Last year I had come to a conclusion that it was time I started making time for myself. I found myself overwhelmed by my days, my weight, and I just couldn't seem to find time to do anything that I wanted to do. We were just beginning our first year of homeschooling, and it was a bit freaky. How would I get it all done? It being, taking care of 3 kids, a house, 5 acres, schooling, and fitting some time for myself in there. 

My days were full of taking care of everyone but myself. I had been trying to heal from bulging discs in my back for almost a year by this point. It was defeating to be in pain everyday. 

I came to the realization that in order for me to have time for myself, I was going to have to MAKE time, and that meant rearranging my day. Sometimes we get so caught up in all the hats that we wear, that we forget to meet the needs of ourselves first. I have been so guilty of that! 

Now, we are all different, our lives are different, so our days look different, but one thing remains the same for all of us, we are all women, and we are the only person who can take care of us. 

We spend our days taking care of everyone else, whether that be your boss, your significant other, children, parents, etc., when do YOU make the list? 

In my case, it was maybe later. Maybe after the kids are in bed. Maybe after the laundry is done. Maybe. Maybe. Maybe. 

No more maybes. NOW! It starts now. You are SO important, and you matter more than you think you do. 

Perhaps you're thinking, "when would I be able to fit me in?" "I don't have time to do anything for me." Uh, yes you do! It just has to be of importance to you. If you're waiting to "find time," it's never going to happen. You have to MAKE time. We all have 24 hours in a day, it's all in how you utilize that time. 

For me, I decided to start my day at least 2 hours before my children wake up. Now, I'm not a morning person. I would much rather lay in bed until I have to get up, but clearly that wasn't working for me and my happiness anymore. I had to make a change. For me. Because I matter. It matters so much for me to be Erica first and foremost. I don't want to lose site of that person.  These children are only in my house for a short amount of time, and while I adore being a stay at home mom, they deserve to have the best version of me possible.  

A woman who loves herself enough to take control of her life-body, mind, and spirit. A woman who says, you are so important. If you want something bad enough, you'll make it happen. Even if it means waking up before most and doing something to empower YOU! 

I'm not saying you have to start your day two hours earlier than your norm, I'm just sharing what has worked for me thus far. Somedays I could get away with starting 3-4 hours early, but getting enough sleep is just as important to me. 

So write down a few things that are important to you that you can't seem to find time for, and take a look at your day and rearrange it so you can make time! I highly encourage focusing on growing your spirit, mind, and getting a little exercise in. You seriously won't regret the decision! 

My decision to make time for myself first thing in the mornings has made an incredible impact on my day. I fill my tank first and foremost, then I'm able to fill everyone else's. When I don't fill my tank, I'm left dry and cranky. Anybody else feel that way by the end of the day?? 

You have to put your own oxygen mask on before assisting others. I leave you with this...